Essay Comments

I was pretty happy that Prof. Scott didn't trash my essay and tell me I needed to rewrite it--but then again I don't think she has the heart to do that to anyone. So I was pretty happy with what I read. My research proposal needed a lot of work when I got it back, but I'm really glad that my essay was mostly well written. There was one idea that she pointed out that I hadn't even thought about--that I was being confusing on whether or not I was talking about VT, or any college. That's a good point since I think I started out talking about VT but by the end of my essay wanted to apply it to all colleges, since my thesis changed as I wrote the essay. Now I know I can go back and make it less confusing. I think it was good that she had a clear idea about whether or not to use personal stories in my essay since I was a little confused about whether that would make my essay more or less legitimate. Anyway, I was definitely in agreement with the items that she pointed out and plan to fix them pronto. And I'm looking forward to the next assignment. 

The Essays

When I first started writing my essay, I already had a lot of it in my mind from the research proposal, which in some ways made it easier and in some ways made it harder. I have begun to feel very trapped by my topic, and I often feel that I am repeating ideas over and over because I have written and rewritten them so many times between my proposal and all the drafts of my essay. I know we have one more assignment to go with the same topics, and after that, I think I won't be writing about AS anymore for a very long time. 

Especially after I heard Prof. Scott's essay in class, I really had an itch to write something more creative, even if it were on my same topic. I feel like I've stuck to academic essays because they are all I know and have experience with from high school. I think the next essay that I write will have to be personal, however, since I have all these ideas rolling around in my head now. 

This Class. (Yes, I'm going to be that general in the title.)

What I find most different about this class from other English classes (and I know I'm not technically supposed to call this an "English Class") is that what we do in class is so productive. 

I remember in high school English we'd maybe...read a short story in class, or do creative writing assignments to be turned in at the end of class, or act out a scene from a Shakespeare play. And then for homework we'd have to write an analytical essay comparing two works of literature we read over the summer, or something like that. And the thing was, there never was a connection between what we did in class and what we did out of class. It always seemed like the out-of-class things were the worthwhile, contemplative, engaging activities while the ones in class were just an hour and a half of filler. 

I really like that in this class the activities we do in class actually contribute to our assignments outside of class. Sometimes, in class, I find myself hoping something like, "I really can't do any more with this essay until I make a definite list of things to improve in it" and then lo and behold that's what we end up doing. 

But not only are the in class activities helpful, but a lot of them are also ones I've never thought to do on my own, and now I know I'll do before writing another essay. 

I think my point is that even though I've said my entire life that I hate English class, since I've always been so frustrated with the way we had it previously, I think I'm finally learning some worthwhile researching methods that will help me in my major. My major is, I think, going to be political science, which involves a lot of research papers. I think I'll be ready. 

How To Improve My Essay

After reviewing the two pieces about essays and also doing all the writing exercises in class today, I've come up with a lot of ways to improve my essay. From the pieces we read for homework, it's pretty clear I should have a lot more focus on exploration and interpretation instead of only focusing on facts. 

A lot of the things we read were about how essays should be personal reflections, etc., but that didn't seem to really apply to my essay since mine is a lot more focused on analysis of facts and has a more concrete thesis. However, I do realize that I need to keep in mind that this isn't a 5th grade style 5 paragraph essay (intro point 1 point 2 point 3 conclusion) which I still tend to do a variation of (sometimes something like intro point point counter point point conclusion). 

Other things I noticed I need to do are put my paragraphs in a more logical order. A lot of what I say is important and needs to stay, but the essay can get confusing since the paragraphs are not in an order that directly leads into my conclusion. 

Also, I think that my thesis in my intro is clear, but the concluding paragraph I have doesn't really connect to that original thesis, so that needs to be fixed up. And one last thing, I'm thinking that after all my persuading essay parts, I should put in a plan-of-action section showing people what needs to be done because of "this this and this" that I outlined in the essay. 

Research Proposal Comments

The comments I got, I think, are very helpful. And not just because it is the same professor who wrote them that will be grading this blog. Most of the comments were directed toward the same idea--I wasn't giving enough detail/I wasn't explaining myself well enough. 

They were helpful because even though I know what I'm talking about when I'm writing, sometimes you need a second reader to tell you where you missed a point...most likely a point you had in your head but never transferred to the paper. 

I guess a lot of what I wrote was based on the research I did, and while I knew the other details, a person who hadn't read those sources would be lost in the proposal. Other than a few smaller problems in my paper, that was the advice given: expand. Actually, that makes complete sense since when I was writing the proposal, I kept thinking to myself, 'I really feel like this isn't long enough, I'm not saying enough.' But while the solution I thought would be to add more sections, really, what I needed to do was add more into each section. 

Contemplations on the Essay

When we first brought up the topic of essays in class, I was a little nervous about that fact that the research we had done for the research proposal was supposed to be enough for our essay as well. For one thing...I think a lot of what I wrote in my research proposal was my own thoughts and ideas which I am thinking now would have a better place in my essay. So I'm not sure what to do about that.

 I think I'll probably repeat some of the same basic information that was in my research proposal, and then expand on my own personal opinion on the issue I was proposing. Also, I have a lot of personal experience with people with AS, so I think I could spice up an essay with stories and accounts of actual people I've met, so I can balance out the more scientific fact after fact after fact style that my research proposal used. I intend to try to appeal to a more everyday person and not pound them with statistics and other boring numbers.

Well...I guessed I answered my own question in my blog. I plan to write an essay with a good balance of facts and personal stories, to make the essay seem intellectual and researched but also make the audience care about what I have to say. 

Fall Break

It's been a long week! I can't wait to relax and de-stress over fall break!